Being unhappy could be circumstantial and less often intentional. Living in a world where we have very little control over our fate, could be a source of unhappiness in its own. There are a lot of things we ought to change to enable us have a happy life, but we’re always helpless in the face of such things.
Despite the the reasons or circumstances that could orchestrate our unhappiness, it is still paramount that we rediscover our source of happiness, to ensure our lovely living.
If one fails to identify an essential or necessary reason to remain happy, they might be held in perpetuity by the claws of unhappiness and depression.
This quest for happiness can be easier if we identify firstly the remote reasons why we’re unhappy. It would inevitably prompt the question: why am I so unhappy?
15 Reasons Why You’re Unhappy
1. You’re yet to identify your purpose
To have a better grasp of your future and life, you have to, as a matter of urgency, identify your purpose and goals. Having a clear picture of your purpose would enhance your understanding of life and keep you focused.
However, if you have not identified your purpose and goals, frustration would be inevitable and you might have the unavoidable feeling of emptiness.
Lack of purpose orchestrates unhappiness and sadness. There would not be the feeling of self accomplishment and actualization.
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2. You have a lot of unaccomplished dreams
The ghosts of accomplished dreams haunt a lot. There’s this feeling of guilt and self-resentment when you remember your unrealised dreams. It could be severe when you have other people around you, who have similar dreams accomplished.
You won’t be happy to live with this guilt. You would continue to resent your misdeeds and regrets. It is a very practical source of unhappiness since you feel daunted by your ineptitude.
3. Loneliness
Man is naturally a social animal. Socialization is the fundamentals of human existence and fulfillment. There’s this feeling of completeness that engulfs you when you’re around people you love. In the absence of this socialization, loneliness becomes imminent.
Being lonely comes with a lot of emotional stress and traumatic thoughts. You think a lot when you’re lonely and you imagine a lot. While in these lonely islands of thoughts, unhappiness becomes unavoidable. If you’re really unhappy, check very well you might be lonely.
4. You worry a lot
Research has maintained that we should avoid things we can’t change. Those circumstances you can’t possibly influence or change, should be left unattended. Concentrate on your goals and optimize every circumstance within your influence.
But if you’re occupied with issues you can’t change, you worry a lot about such issues. Because you can’t handle them, you feel helpless and unhappy. Reduce things you worry about, to enhance your chances of being happy.
5. You think so much about your past
The past has gone and should be forgotten. Everything about the past should be swept behind but the experiences. Take the experiences where necessary and apply them in your future endeavors.
Allowing your past to cloud your thought process and activate unhappiness. Once you remember your past, especially the excruciating one, the thoughts would get you demoralized. Your unhappiness becomes inevitable.
6. Pessimism
Pessimists are rarely satisfied and accomplished. Being pessimistic would encircle your thoughts around bad and unfortunate circumstances. You’d hardly see the possibilities and opportunities within. You’d become unhappy if it persisted.
To avoid this, strive to remain optimistic in the face of issues irrespective of the circumstance. Optimism would allow you to identify with positive-minded persons, with a resilient approach to situations.
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7. You undermine personal relationships
Our friends and family are natural sources of attention and joy. The undivided attention we get from friends and family is always essential to reduce our mental stress. In the absence of such care, attention and affection, you’d feel neglected and unhappy.
If you cherish happiness, don’t undermine the relevance of personal relationships. It comes with so much attention that’d make you fulfilled and relaxed.
8. You don’t create time for the right things
Sometimes we’re so much immersed in work to the extent that we neglect the right things. These are things that complete us. It could be enough exercise, frequent medical checkup, enough time with family, and leisure.
When these right things are not met, one wouldn’t be completely happy. You may end up getting occupied with the wrong things that would eventually rob you of your happiness.
9. You keep grudges
Keeping grudges is akin to taking poison and expecting someone else to die. With grudges in your mind, you’d consistently produce negative thoughts that would emit negative energy. You won’t be happy and it may spread to other people around you.
10. You’re materialistic
People who are very much attached to material things are rarely happy. Being materialistic comes with a huge price – discontentment – which one may not readily afford in the long run. You get carried away with materialism while losing a necessary grip on reality.
To be happy, you need to control your attachment to materialism and discover satisfaction in things within reach. This would control your discontentment and make you comfortable with the little you have.
11. You’re pretty much concerned about failure
It is okay to avoid failure but being so concerned about it is quite unnecessary. You’d lose concentration and your zeal because you’re afraid to fail. Opportunities and successes would elude you because you’re not ready to take risks.
In the end, you get angry at yourself for failing without even trying. You become unhappy. Being so skeptical about failure is a source of unhappiness.
12. Lack of meditation and self-talk
Self-talk and meditation give calmness of mind. They avail you the opportunity to re-evaluate your goals and dreams. The thought process is very necessary to keep the mind afresh and energized.
If you frequently miss meditation and self-talk, a lot of turbulence would occupy your mind and you’d lack resolve. Maintain frequent meditation and self-talk to maintain frequent happiness.
13. You compare yourself to other people
Comparison is the root of low self-esteem. Lack of confidence in yourself is very possible when you begin to compare yourself to other people. You’d only see their perfections without recognizing their flaws.
Equating their perfections to your seeming imperfections would create an unhappy mind. You would become unhappy because you feel some people are better off than you.
There are a lot of unseen contours in this map. Don’t allow yourself to be deceived by what you can see about other people. They certainly have a plethora of challenges which you’d never crave for. Find contentment and happiness in yourself.
14. Boredom
When we are occupied by work and responsibilities, we unlikely get depressed. But when we’re bored because of lack of activities, our minds are easily entrapped in bad thoughts. We tend to ponder over things we would have forgotten.
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15. You keep friends with negative energy
Negative energies are negative thoughts that have been trapped within a person’s mind, creating negative actions – fear, hatred, jealousy and hatred. When negative energy is emitted it could be contagious and negatively effective.
Keeping people with negative thoughts and energy, we tend to resonate with them and, eventually create an unhappy environment for ourselves.